Kitten!
by Lianwa
Summary: Spike has an unwanted mystical experience, as he was the original target Xander decides to help him deal with it.
1. Prologue

Spike was asleep in the most uncomfortable and ugly looking chair he'd ever had the misfortune to be tied up in. He was having lovely dreams of eviscerating his unwilling host when he was awakened by an uncomfortable tingling he always associated with magic.

When he started complaining about his awful treatment, "Can't get any bloody sleep and why am I on the floor!", he was very unhappy to realize that instead of his lovely voice he was hearing a pissed off cat. The fact he was hearing a cat made him very nervous, hoping the magic had just messed with his voice he took inventory of his current situation.

Four Paws – check

Claws (Not that I can currently use the buggers) - check

Tail - check

Heartbeat gulp - check

Craving for Blood – no

Craving for Tuna – check

After he stopped swearing and panicking Spike decided to wake Xander in traditional cat fashion. He sat on Xander's chest and stared at his sleeping face.


	2. Chapter 1

Xander woke up with a dry mouth, a horrible headache, and a sinking feeling in his stomache. 'Urgh, what did I drink last night to have a hangover like this? I remember arguing with Buffy and Willow that I didn't want to take Spike home with me. Now that I have an apartment I want to keep vampires OUT not invite them in, and besides, if I wanted a pet I'd get a cat. I came home, tied him up, and went back to bed. Hey! I didn't drink last night what the hell happened?'

Xander looked at the clock as he absentmindedly shoved the protesting cat of his chest and saw it was half past way too damn early in the morning. He started to sleepily take stock of his surroundings. 'Alright, I'm not injured but Spike's not in the recliner and there's a pissed off cat on my bed. Where the hell did that come from?'

"Spike are you in here?"

Myao

"I'll get to you in a minute cat I have to find the neutered vampire first."

'He's not in the bathroom, not hiding under or behind anything, not in the kitchen, the door's still locked. How did that cat get in here anyways…'

"Well cat I don't know how you got in here, did Spike let you in and sneak out, no I already saw that the door's still locked. Come to think of it you look a lot like Spike. Same color eyes, same color hair, same pissed off look when I say something stupid."

YOW!

"Aw crap. This is stupid but then again the hellmouth is fairly close by. Spike is that you?"

YOW!

"Dammit Willow, she probably messed up another spell or aimed one at me and it hit you instead. I'll give her a call after breakfast and see if I can get her to reverse it.

Myao

"Are you a vampire cat or a cat cat? Blood or Tuna for breakfast?" babbled Xander.

Spike thought for a minute then jumped up on Xander's kitchen countertop and pawed the cabinet.

"Tuna for you, cereal for me."

----30 minutes later----

"I don't care if you were supposed to go shopping with Buffy today Willow!", yelled Xander into the phone.

"You just admitted you tried to turn me into a cat last night and now I've got a Spike cat in my apartment! Come over and fix it or I won't be making those bookcases for Giles today because I'll be cat sitting!"

Xander slammed the phone down on her complaining voice and ran his gingers through his hair.

"She wasn't even sorry she tried to turn me into a cat. She was just upset it didn't work and trying to figure out why it hit you instead."

"I swear sometimes I wonder why I even stick around. They're treating me like a handyman, not that I get paid for fixing things they break, and acting like I'm useless at everything else."

Xander didn't even notice that Spike had jumped into his lap and he was automatically petting him.

"If I could afford it I'd leave town and set up shop somewhere else for a while and just come pack to help with the occasional apocalypse."

Myao

"Don't' worry Spike, I'll get Willow to fix you first. I wouldn't want to be stuck as a cat so I won't leave you until we get this fixed. Worst comes to worst you can come with me.'

"Hopefully she'll have you fixed by the end of the day. We start work at a new site tomorrow."

---Scene Break---

Willow showed up an hour later and let herself into Xander's apartment without bothering to knock first.

"This better not take long Xander. I've got plans today."

"You wouldn't be here right now if you hadn't tried to turn me into a cat Willow. What were you thinking? You know magic goes screwy around me."

"I was thinking you like cats and might want to see things from there perspective/ Seemed like a good idea at the time."

"And you couldn't be bothered to ASK me before changing my species!"

"It was late so I figured you'd be sleeping. Oooh is this the Spike kitty? He's so cute!"

Myow!

snort

"I think he just said he's not cute he's evil."

Purrr

"Okay so he's an evil cat. I'll just make him a nonevil cat."

"No Willow just make him a vampire again."

Willow starts pouting at Xander, "But I don't like vampires, cats are much nicer, even the big ones in the zoo," she whined.

"Dammit Willow just fix him already!"

She huffs,"There's no reason to shout, I brought my kit with me so I'll have him all better in a jiffy."

"Sit in the middle of the floor Spike"

Myow

Spike got up and slowly walks to where Willow pointed. He doesn't like magic and hates being involved in a spell – even if it is to fix a problem caused by another spell.

"Xander since you were the original target of the spell you need to stand next to him but not touching."

Xander winces at the reminder he was the original target and joins Spike in the center of the room.

20 minutes, 4 candles, a little scented oil, and some stinky herbs in a bowl later and Willow's chanting a counterspell. Her voice rises until she yells one last word, the candels flare and the herbs ignite into a cloud of smoke that was much larger than it should be.

When the smoke gets to be too much to stand Xander moves to open a window and then starts to head to the door only to hear it slam open as Willow rushes out.

"That should do it. Bye Xander, Bye Spike, see you at research tonight."

Xander coughs a few times and waits for the smoke to clear. 'Good thing I disabled the smoke alarm before she got here or it'd be going crazy by now.'

He walked back to the center of the room to check on Spike. There in the middle of the floor the smoke had cleared to show…Spike the Cat.

"Well crap."


	3. Chapter 2

Spike woke up slowly. He remembered being turned into a cat. He also remembered Willow coming over and doing the spell to reverse the cat transformation. He rolled over and started to stand up. Only to realize he just had. Everything was still huge which meant….

YOW!

The reversal spell hadn't worked.

"Hey Spike."

MROW!

"No need to cuss…at least I think that was a cuss, Brits say the weirdest things. I've called the Magic Box. Giles said to come over after you woke up. So whenever you're ready we'll see if he can figure out where Willow screwed up and get it corrected."

Yow, mrow.

"I don't know if we need a blanket or not. You seem to not be a vampire cat. Let's see if the sunlight hurts. If it doesn't hurt we'll take the blanket just in case and head on over. You're small enough to sit on my shoulder if you want and just enjoy the sunshine."

Spike felt a little nervous but since he didn't want to be stuck as a cat he didn't have much of a choice.

Xander opened the door and Spike crept out towards the edge of light and shadow and slowly eased his paw and then the rest of his body into the sunlight.

Myow

Spike looked back at Xander with a questioning look .

"You look pretty good in the sunlight Spike. Like a Siamese only solid colored blonde with the hair getting darker at the roots." Xander laughed softly. "I guess if I'd remembered to pick up the dye Friday you'd be so white it'd hurt to look at you."

Myow!

Spike performed an instinctive cat move. When a human insults you turn and show him your butt.

"Funny Spike, you want to walk or ride?"

Spike turned back to him then calmly walked up his jeans and shirt and made himself comfortable on Xander's shoulder.

"Ow, watch the claws Spike that hurts!"

Myow…myow!

"Crap, something else to talk to Giles about. Your head doesn't explode from hurting me and I just realized I'm hearing your voice in my head when you meow."

purrr

"Same to you smartass."

Spike rather enjoyed the walk to the Magic Box. He hadn't been out in the sun since his death except for that one glorious afternoon with the ring of Amara.

Eventually the two wound up in front of the Magic Box. They could hear Giles yelling at Willow from outside the store.

"This doesn't sound good Spike, he's going completely Ripper on her."

In response Spike jumped down from Xander's shoulder and waited for him to open the door.

- - - Scene Break - - - -

Xander opened the door to the store in time to hear Giles yelling, "and you will sit there and research a proper reversal until it is found or I say you may leave!"

Myao

"Oh I say, Spike is that you?"

Myao

snort

"And just what is it about this situation that you find amusing Xander?"

"I wasn't laughing at that G-man, I was laughing at what he said."

"Don't call me that," said Giles as he pulled his glasses off and began polishing them.

"You understand him?"

"Yeah, he said 'No you great wanker I'm some other poor bloke transmogrified into a bloody cat."

"I didn't realize he knew words quite that large."

Hiss

claw swipe

"Ow Bloody Hell! There's no need for violence Spike!"

Hiss

"Um shouldn't his head be all ow right now Giles?" asked Buffy.

A stake materialized in her hand. "He can hurt people, that means I can stake him."

"Buffy put Mr. Pointy away you're not staking Spike as long as he's a cat, that would be animal abuse."

"Yes Giles." A pouting Buffy sat next to Willow at the research table.

"Tara and Anya will be back shortly to help with research.Until then get started while I talk to Xander and Spike."

The two girls mumbled okays and opened books while Giles led Xander and Spike back to the office.

"All right Xander, I need you to go over everything that happened since last night so I can figure out how to direct the research."

Xander quickly recaps the research from the previous night and the events of that morning.

"She kept calling on Bast while she was doing the unsuccessful counterspell Giles. Isn't that the goddess of cats?"

"Yes it is Xander, and if she thinks Spike makes a good cat she may not let the spell be reversed now that she's aware of it."

Myow!

"Dammit I told her to turn him back to a vampire when she said she was going to make him a non evil cat."

"I'm sorry Spike but she's a fairly powerful goddess. Since you are a cat now you may be able to pray to her for guidance."

Spike suddenly looked very small and uttered a forlorn little "mew".

Xander blinked in surprise.

"Um, Spike, you just…shrank."

The kitten cocked his head to one side, thought for a moment then got up and started pacing. As he paced he got steadily larger, past the original midsize cat and kept getting larger and larger. Eventually Spike was so large he couldn't easily turn around in the office.

"He's, he's, HE'S A BLOODY SABRETOOTHED TIGER. WHAT IN THE BLOODY NAME OF CHAOS DID YOU DO!"

From the other room they heard a faint "Eeep."

Suddenly Spike got a satisfied look on his face and pawed the handle of the door. When it opened he took in a deep breath and let out a loud coughing ROARRRR.

The happy looking cat then turned back to the men and gave them a pointed look.

"Translation please Xander."

"Uh he said this was more like it, at least he's not helpless anymore."

Growl

"He also said he want's steak for lunch, he's hungry."

"Fascinating, he seems to have the ability to shift through different cat forms."

Giles was polishing his glasses so hard Xander was afraid he'd need a new pair.

"Spike can you try to think of yourself in your base form? Just close your eyes and concentrate on how you feel when you first wake up for the night."

Spike sat down, closed his eyes and concentrated for a moment. He rapidly shrank down until he was back to the midsized cat he'd woken up as.

"Thank you Spike that's enough."

"That's pretty neat Spike," said Xander. "Just think of the pranks you could pull by being able to shapshift like that.

As Xander opened his mouth to comment Buffy rushed in brandishing a sword, "Where's the demon, I heard a demon, I'm hear to kill it!"

"The noise was Spike Buffy, as you can see he's not much of a demon at the moment. Maybe you should wait until we call for help."

"Dammit Xander I know he's a demon, I mean look at him he's so…tiny? With really big kitten eyes? I can't kill that he's…he's cute. That's not fair! How can he look so little and cute?" Buffy started shaking her head and started back to the research table with the sword over her shoulder.

"Do put the sword back in the training room Buffy. You won't need it for researching."

She waved a hand in acknowledgement and kept walking while muttering to herself about the unfairness of life and why can't she just kill something already.

The three males looked at each other before starting to laugh.

"Yes well, let's give ourselves a moment before we continue shall we?'

- - - - End Chapter 2 - - - -


End file.
